A drunk is taking a leak right on the street.
A policeman says to him:
- You could have done it behind the corner!
- My dick is no fire hose, you know?
An international competition for the title of the manliest man comprised three tests. Every participant must:
1. Drink in one gulp a bottle of vodka;
2. Walk into a cage and shake hands with a female bear,
and 3. to make love to a woman from a remote Siberian village who never in her life took a bath.
A Frenchman drank all of the vodka, and dropped dead.
An Englishman drank vodka, then walked into the cage, and dropped dead when he saw the female bear.
A Russian drank vodka, and walked into the cage. There was a noisy commotion, and then the Russian walked out of the cage, buttoning his pants, and asked, "Where is the woman to shake her hand?"